Into March

Here I am in March, still surviving my 4th semester here at BYU. Things are going pretty well for the most part. My most frustrating class by far right now is Calculus. I really think I'm going to get some sort of B or C in that class, which will of course lower my GPA a fair amount since it's a freakin' 4 credit class. Though, I figured it out and it really wouldn't lower it too much. It'll be okay... I really am learning a lot. The most frustrating part is that my grades don't seem to be reflecting that very much, and our teacher hasn't really structured the class to give you much credit for trying really hard. Well, I guess he kind of has... but it's not really working for me. I got really frustrated on Friday night. There was an online homework due and I had literally spent hours on the last 4 problems that I just could not figure out what I was doing wrong. Some of them I just flat out didn't know how to do, and some of them I felt like I did but kept getting the wrong answer. So I ended up getting about a 50 on the assignment and just wasting a bunch of time trying to figure out the problems and getting no credit for using that time. It was rather frustrating. Though, I know that it really did help me learn more to go through it, right? Sure. I don't know, I'll just be happy to be through with this class.

I was complaining about CS 124 before, but now life should be a fair amount easier in that class since I passed off my last assembly lab on Friday. Now we get to do labs in C! I'm so excited. We have our second test this week, and I'm hoping to do well on it. I have learned a lot from doing the labs. Let's hope that shows on the test.

As far as other things going on, it's great. :) I absolutely love Music Theory, I seem to be doing fairly well in Dictation, Sight Singing exists, I love my Music Education class, private lessons are surprisingly going well, and work is fun. It's just the two classes for my Comp Sci major. There's this nagging thought in the back of my mind that's saying, "Why are you doing this again?" Then I remember that I'll love having the knowledge and that I really do love to learn it all. It can just be frustrating at times. I promised myself I could do it, and I'm going to stick to the plan. I can do it, gosh darn it! Prove all the people that don't believe that I can do it wrong! Mwhaha! :)

In other news, I'm actually going on dates. I know, it's incredible. What's even more incredible is that it's with the same guy! Well, I least I think you'd call them dates. We haven't really officially titled anything, but he has paid for my food and such. He's another CS 142 TA, and we were chatting on gmail, and then he said that I should come over and watch V for Vendetta with him since we were talking about it. He hadn't seen it and I was telling him how awesome it was. He happened to have it. So, about a week or so later, I actually did come over and watch it with him. Then I ended up coming over for dinner a couple days later and staying until about 10 just talking and whatnot. Then we went to Taco Bell and got ice cream on Friday night (which was somewhat unexpected), and then today I went to his place with Ashley to have dinner and play Settlers of Catan. Oh boy, it's been fun. We'll just see where it all goes. :)

I have another song that I wrote that I've somewhat deemed "finished." It's called, "Suppression." Some of the things in it have been somewhat experimental, but I like it a lot. Hopefully I can play it in Master Classes sometime and maybe record it or something.

Alright, I should head off to bed. Until next week! :)

So Quick!

It's the last Sunday of February. Weird! It's gone by so quickly! That means that it's almost March, which means that we're already more than halfway done with the semester. That's actually somewhat worrisome. I don't feel like I'm more than halfway done with some of my classes, but it's all good. :)

So what happened of great importance this past week? Well, I suffered through yet another Calculus midterm. I think I did better than I did on the last one, but we'll see. I at least did better on the multiple choice, so that's somewhat encouraging. I also finished my CS 124 lab and even did the extra credit for an extra point, so I got 11 out of 10 points. I'm actually getting assembly, it's great. There's just one more lab in assembly, and then we finally get to start programming in C. I'm so excited! I'll actually know what's going on, and it seems like the labs won't take me as long. I plan on trying to do the extra credit most of the time and turn in my labs early to make up for the exam and some of the homework I've only done okay on. I could still pull off an A fairly easily if I keep that up. Oh boy, it's such good times. It's hard at first, but I love having the knowledge.

What is kind of depressing is Calc 2. There was online homework due on Friday and I worked for hours on it... ended up giving up when I had spent two hours on two problems that I just could not get. So I got a 67 on it. It just doesn't seem fair to spend that much time on something to only get a 67. I really hate the way that the class is structured. It doesn't reflect how much time you put into it very well. I really miss the way it was last semester. Our teacher likes to get behind on his schedule, so we have to shove all of these little things at the end before every test. I like him, he's a good teacher and obviously knows what he's talking about. I just miss the way it was. I am learning quite a bit, I suppose that's what matters most. I have a strange feeling that this semester will lower my GPA. It'll be okay. Maybe getting a better grade in Dictation will make up for it. I got a B+ on the last pace test! At this point I really think I have an A- in the class. That won't quite make up for some kind of B in the 4 credit Calculus class, but it'll do something. Oh well, I'm okay. Learning is what matters, and I'm definitely doing that. :)

Oh, how could I forget?? It's now official that I'm going to Korea and Japan with Wind Symphony this May! They are going on tour there, and I wasn't going to go because they just don't take the English Horn player. It's a money issue. But I found out last week that one of the Clarinet players has been having some financial issues and couldn't go, which left open a spot for me. So, I'm going!! It's insane! It only costs $1000, and then there's the fees with getting a passport. It is $1000... but this is the chance of a lifetime. I'm never going to be able to do something like this ever again. It's insane to think about, actually. I'm so excited. Which, with that means that I have to go to this culture class at 7 AM on Wednesdays. It's a fairly small price for being able to go, but that means that I'm on campus from 7 AM to 7 PM, at the least. Last Wednesday I was on campus from 7 AM until about 10 PM taking my Calculus midterm. It was such a bundle of fun. So, anyway... that's exciting. I'm also going to Fan Fair with my mom a couple weeks after that again. Man, I'm just getting into this traveling thing this summer. It'll cost some money, which I fortunately have saved up, but it'll be so much fun. I love seeing the world and different cultures. Oh boy!

Alright, I think this'll do for now. Have a wonderful week! :)

A Week of Extremes

I missed Sunday's update... but oh well. This'll do. :)

This past week I felt somewhat bipolar. Maybe not in the precise definition of the condition, but just that one day I felt somewhat depressed and sad about certain things, and then the next day I was exuberantly happy. It was kind of weird. Since, though, I've mostly stayed with "exuberantly happy." Wednesday in general was a very stressful day. I wanted to get my CS 124 lab done so I wouldn't have to worry about finishing it on Thursday (since it was due on Thursday) and I had to perform the first movement of the Mozart Concerto in Master Classes that night only rehearsing with my pianist for the first time an hour before we performed (not to mention I was basically just learning the second half of it), and I had a couple other things that were due that day as well. I just wanted it to be over. I didn't seem to have much done with my lab by 8 o' clock that night, and after performing in Master Classes, I felt like I didn't do very well at all. Right after performing I was rather proud of myself for just making it through since I had only really rehearsed it once and was hoping to just get the notes and rhythms right with a couple other things. And I did just that! The 3 or 4 hours before I had spent at work listening to various recordings of people playing the first movement on youtube so I could just get it in my head. It probably would've helped to have the music in front of me, but I had that thing stuck in my head like nobody's business. I was feeling pretty good. Then came the comments. They weren't terrible, it was just nobody said anything good about it. It was all, "This should've been more exaggerated, the style needed to be more this and that..." Someone mentioned that I needed to just get a recording to know how certain things go. I knew there was one spot that many people played a certain way, but I just chose not to. I guess that made her think I didn't know how it was supposed to go. I did play one half note as one beat because I had gotten in the habit of doing that in my practicing just out of stupidity. Maybe that's what she was thinking of. After sitting down I just felt like I had completely insulted a standard in Oboe literature. Like I should've just nailed it and failed. All I wanted was one good thing said, and nobody said anything. If anything, it was like people were eager to tell me everything I did wrong. 

So, needless to say, I felt pretty down. I think in retrospect it's just that it is one of those pieces that everybody knows and so the whole time I was playing they had a certain recording in their head and all they could think of was how what I was doing didn't match what they had going in their mind. I'm not a terrible Oboist, I know that. It was fine. I'm just learning it, and it's a freakin' beast. It'll be alright. :)

I got home and was just thinking about how I really needed to finish my lab, and I just wasn't getting it. It's frustrating because with Computer Science stuff I normally get it. I've had so much experience with it, and I freakin' teach it to people every day. I feel like I should catch on quickly. But in CS 124, we are dealing with stuff that's completely knew. Gates, latches, MDR, Program Counter, etc. So much information to absorb. I've found that usually with this type of stuff, I feel slower than normal right at first. Like I just don't get it as fast as most people are getting it. Then, one moment, it just makes sense. It's like an exponential growth of knowledge as things click here and there. I'm finally hitting that point where things are making sense. But, Wednesday night, I was still at the beginning slow stage trying to figure things out. All I had to do was making a program that took single digit numbers until you pressed "=" and it would output the sum. Sounds simple. In Java I could code that up in about 2 minutes. But in this class, I had to do it in assembly. I was actually excited to learn how to program in assembly. It's like the base level of programming. You have to tell the computer how to do everything. Right at first, it's just giberish. It makes no sense. Well, needless to say, Wednesday night I finally got it to work! Things made sense! I went to bed happy.

Thursday morning came and life was grand! Except for the fact that I had an incoming Calculus test I didn't feel ready for, I loved it! I was at work and I was just giddy. I taught a help session for CS 142 and I think I was just a little too excited for the students to teach loops and conditional statements. It was so weird. I felt odd being so happy after feeling so depressed the day before.

Oh! I also had a Dictation Pace test on Thursday--I got a B+ or A- again! (I'm not completely sure, but right around there.) I keep feeling like I'm getting lucky. I might just be able to pull off a B+ in that class. That'd be so grand. It'd make up for whatever grade I'm going to get in Calc 2. Ugh, that class is the death of me. It just takes so long to do everything. I'm planning on taking the second midterm tomorrow night. It's going to be torture again, I just know it. I'm hoping to pass this one, but we'll see. I attempted to study today, and it took me two hours to do the first 3 problems on the review. Well, we looked at some other things. Oh boy. It'll be fun, I just know it.

Let's not forget that this was a three-day weekend! We had today off! I know it's somewhat rare to get President's Day off in college, but this will sadly be the last day we get off until the end of the semester. Which, in terms of working is good. In fact, I'm not too torn up about it because we get out so early. Oh wow... we are already in the middle of February. It's actually kind of worrisome that we are already so far into the semester when I feel like so many of my classes shouldn't be close to finishing. Like I haven't done enough to really sustain my grade where I want it to be. *cough* Calculus! *cough*

Oh boy, I'm typing quite a bit. Today there was a kind of Music 276 party again. It was fun as always! We watched "Much Ado About Nothing" and had pizza and cookies, as well as played Mad Gab. What a fun game. It was somewhat frustrating to hear everyone complain about Keanu Reeve's "terrible" acting everytime he'd come on screen since I was somewhat obsessed with him back in the day. I didn't say anything. I wouldn't say that the first thing I thought of when they suggested watching that movie was that it had Keanu Reeves' in it. In fact, when they first showed his face, someone said, "Oh, I forgot he was in this movie!" Then people went on to say how he was Neo, was a horrible actor, and his best movie was Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure. They'd say that he probably didn't have any idea what he was saying and was just repeating lines he had memorized with certain feelings associated with it. If there's one thing I know, it's that Keanu Reeves is not dumb. He's actually very smart. I'm not gonna say he's the best actor I know, but I know that he's not as terrible as people make him out to be. Maybe I should've said something. It obviously kind of bothered me. Oh well! :)

Alright, I think I'll stop here and head off to bed. I've got to get up early tomorrow to do my sight singing homework. What a joy!

[Insightful Title]

Another week has gone by and I'm surviving. :) I had my first private lesson of the semester on Friday. Friday at 9:00... PM. Yeah, it was rather exciting. We don't have Geralyn this semester because she's busy recording a CD and doing a mini tour thing with her trio. So, we have Sarah Holden for the semester. She's really nice and really knows what she's talking about, I just can't help but miss Geralyn. Sarah got a Bachelor's and Master's degree in Oboe at Juilliard. So she definitely knows what she's talking about. :P The only problem is that she has to arrange her schedule to fit her husband working so that at least one of them is home with her kids. So, she could only have lessons on Monday and Friday evening, and Saturday morning. I ended up being stuck with the Friday time at 9, which I actually switched to be at 8 now. It went well, though. She had some good things to say.

Other than that, Ashley and I got pizza Friday night and rented House Bunny. I've recently discovered the amazingness that is RedBox. It's so convenient! There's one about half a block away and Ashley and I can just go and rent a movie for the night for a dollar. I'm getting caught up on movies I haven't seen that I wanted to.

I had my first Dictation pace test last Thursday as well... I think I got a B+! I'm not exactly sure yet, but I got between a B and an A-. I was so proud of myself. I didn't do that well on the mock pace test. This semester is so different... and it's so much harder than the other semesters. I was getting worried, but if I keep this up, I'll get the highest grade yet in the class! Yay for that!

So far in Calculus, things are going okay. Our first exam started on Friday and goes until tomorrow, Tuesday being the late day. If I study I should do alright... there were just a couple things I wasn't exactly sure about. This semester doesn't require me to do all of the written homework, and I'm totally not. So I'm not doing Calculus as much, and it's not sinking in as well. Oops. I should try to get in the habit of doing that so I actually learn better. This class is structured a lot differently than last semesters was, it's taking some adjusting. I'm just going to hope for at least an A-, like last semester. I've got to really learn this stuff as well, since I'm taking multi-variable Calculus this Spring. It'll move faster and it seems like it'd be harder. If I just apply myself I can do really well at it, I know I can. It's just a matter of applying myself. :) It should be fun. I really do like math.

I started taking these online classes this summer: Biology 100 and Doctrine and Covenants 1. I didn't really do much... I only have until mid-May to finish them without paying an extension fee. They cost a lot of money! I just need to remember when I finish them I'll get reimbursed 75% from my parents... which would certainly be nice. It's nice to have money. I'm happy that I have quite a bit more money than I did at this point last year. Not to mention I'm making $1.40 more an hour than I was last Winter, and the same number of hours. I should be making a lot of money this semester! Maybe eventually I'll buy something big... like a laptop or a car. I really like my desktop, and it was a lot cheaper than buying a laptop, but the mobility would certainly be nice. I wouldn't really need it with the classes I'm taking right now, but this summer and on I could use it in my computer science classes. I can't decide if I'd want a Mac, PC, or a Linux machine. I want to get used to Mac and Linux like I am with Windows. I'm not sure I'd want a PC if it had Vista on it... or maybe I should so I can get used to that. Blech, I should worry about that later. Yay for having money!

Okay, I think that'll do for now. Maybe next week I'll have a new video to post since I do have a camera that can take videos now. Oh, that sounds like fun. Look forward to it! :)

Sarah had a date??

So, I had a date Saturday night. I know, weird! This guy randomly called me on Tuesday and he did just what you'd expect. "I was just wondering if you would like to go out with me this Friday night?" Whoa! Weird! "Well, I actually have a band social Friday night I was planning on going to..." "Saturday night?" So quick! So, I couldn't say no. "I'll pick you up at 6." Now, before everyone gets all excited and whatnot, this guy isn't someone I would really date seriously. He's a nice guy, but not someone I could really see as a boyfriend.

We ended up going to dinner at this El Salvadorian place and had some delicious food! I don't remember what it was called, but it was nice. And it made me think of Flora back at home. :) Our waitress didn't even speak English. Oh boy, it would've been nice if Flora were there to translate for me. Though, we were able to point and figure out what we wanted easily enough. After that, we went to this comedy show called "Divine Comedy." I'd heard a lot about it and how funny it was. It was great! I loved it. :) We got there about an hour early to wait in line, and it's a good thing we did. There were already 20 or so people there waiting in line for it. It was a packed show. They even handed out these little activity packets with a word search and crossword puzzle to keep people busy. So we ended up doing that while we waited. After the show, I thought it would be it, but then he offered ice cream. Nice! So we went to Baskin Robbins and he bought me a single scoop of Mint Chocolate Chip ice cream... yum. He was a real gentlemen and paid for everything. Free food! I always love free food. :) And there was no awkward moments when he wanted to hold my hand or anything. Man, that would've been really awkward. I hope he knows I wouldn't really want anything more than friends... man, I'm bad at this. I hate saying things I know disappoint people. Oh well, we'll see. :)

So, other than that I also had school and such this week. Thursday and Friday I normally go to schools to observe for my Music Ed class, but the Utah schools didn't have school! So I didn't have class!! It was wonderful. I got to sleep in and not have class until 10. Oh boy... it was so incredibly nice. Though, I realized about 10 minutes ago that I had a Sight Singing pace test planned Friday morning that I completely spaced about... I guess I'll have to make that up later. Yay!

In other news, there's another Calculus midterm that I'm planning on taking tomorrow. I feel like I should be able to do well, because I honestly understand all of the concepts and have most if not all of the things memorized that I should have memorized. If not... I should be able to at least figure them out from the other things I know. I'm hoping to pull off an A in that class. If I just keep up with the work and everything, I should be able to pull it off. Then it'll just be Calc 2 and all the other fun math classes I plan on taking after that. I really do enjoy math, though. It just takes up time. :)

Speaking of Calculus, I really should do my assigned reading and take the quiz that goes with it. Lucky me!

Procrastinating is Phun!

I should be reading my Calculus and taking a quiz saying that I read my Calculus, but I feel like procrastinating it a bit longer. Since I've written a blog the past two Sundays, I'll make it a goal to try and write a blog at least once a week--on Sunday. So here I am! Writing another blog. Good times indeed.

I took my first Dictation pace test last Thursday--not exactly sure how it went. This teacher, who is another grad student, grades them on his own. I guess to ensure that we don't cheat. But now I don't know what I got on it until Tuesday. A little nerve-wracking since I'm positive I messed up the last harmonic dictation part. I... had some weird stuff there. At least I'm pretty certain on the bass... and he grades nicely on the analysis. Even if the analysis is wrong, if we analyzed what we wrote as the chord correctly, we get points. I didn't do so well on the mock exam... I'm positive I did better on this one. Whatever. Passing the four semesters of dictation is my goal. I was able to pull off a B last semester--which was awesome. Having a B again would be cool. B+ to an A awesome--but highly unlikely. I guess we'll see!

I always have Calculus homework to do. Luckily, I mostly enjoy what I'm doing so it's not that big of a deal. It's just every night when I'm thinking of what I need to do for the next day, there's always Calculus on the list. I either have to read the chapter and take a quiz about it, or do written homework. There are also quizzes due on Monday, Wednesdays, and Fridays, but I luckily work on all three of those days and I usually just finish the quizzes then. I should try to get out of that habit though. There are going to be days that I'll be actually working the whole time and I won't have time to finish the quizzes. Not to mention the material is going to be getting harder and the quizzes will take longer. Calculus 2 should just be a load of fun. :) It is nice having a math class. I like math. In fact, I think I decided I wanted to minor in Math. Yup, a double major in Music Education and Computer Science with a Math minor. Three of the classes I have to take for the minor are already required for the Computer Science major, and one class can replace a class that's required for the Computer Science major. So really it's just a matter of taking 2 or 3 more classes. Not a big deal. I might as well, right? :) Somewhere down the road if I really wanted, I could probably get a job teaching Math. I hear those people are in short supply. That'd be fun.

I'm slowly getting better and better at the Viola. I got another oboist who also played Violin/Viola in high school to show me how to bow correctly. Now I actually play the instrument better! Now I just need to try and train my fingers to find the spots on the Viola for the notes so I can be in tune. Supposedly lots of string players are out of tune, even some string performance majors. At least that's what some people tell me. I'm not going to be one of them. :P I can try at least. I figure this is the time to try and get my fingers in the right places and train my ear to be in tune. I'm probably dreaming. Oh well!

My lesson last week went fine. Besides the fact that she asked me to play my E scale stuff. Which that just happened to be the one scale that I hoped she wouldn't pick. Literally, every other scale I worked on until it was back to where it was last semester. But 30-45 minutes later when I finally got to E, my mouth was getting pretty tired. I just ran through it until I played it right once. I didn't really get my fingers to remember sufficiently. It kind of came out with my fingers got confused up high. But, it's all good. I did practice it again so my fingers remember now. She'll probably pick another scale tomorrow--or forget. That'd be nice. :P I can play my freakin' scales. I practiced them to death my first semester. Literally, I played them an hour a day. For the first 20 or 30 minutes each hour that I practiced I would run through all my scales. I remember once spending an entire hour on just scales. It was rather boring and monotonous. Thus why I kind of am losing the will to practice them as much. I should try and be better about practicing. I scheduled practice rooms--but lots of them are in the evenings. Which means after I've already gone home and eaten and settled back in, I have to walk back to the HFAC and practice for an hour. It's not that big of a deal--it's just a matter of getting myself up and doing it. I need to get in the habit... habit... I just have so many classes this semester. Well, not really classes, just lots of classes that take up a lot of time. Then if there's anytime before 6, I'm working or practicing or something. I'm not like really stressed out, just have a lot to take my time. In fact, I'd say I'm pretty happy right now. I enjoy my classes for the most part, and I know how everything goes. Regardless, I'll be happy when this school year is over. :P I'll be done with the silly music core! (Music Theory, Sight Singing, and Dictation) I really like Music Theory, but I could definitely do without Sight Singing and Dictation. Oh... I just remembered. I have Sight Singing homework to do tonight. Blech... that'll be fun.

What else? Oh, I finally did my wash. Good for me. It costs so freakin' much here! I wonder if the prices went up at Helaman Halls, too. It cost $1.25 per wash, and $1.00 to dry each wash. I had three loads--it cost me a freakin' $6.75 to do my laundry! Insanity. Especially when you're used to umm... free. Oh well. I'll just remember to have more naked days. Anything to save money. Ooorr... I could just never do my wash. Be smelly! Totally worth the money.

I hope you all know I'm kidding.

I suppose I should end this post and do my homework. Fun!

Creepy Phone Calls

Today was a good day. All last month Wednesdays sucked because I was basically swamped with stuff to do and things to go to all day long. I had a class from 7:30 to 9:00 PM that only met four times, and now it's over! Well, we aren't meeting anymore, anyway. We have a final project due by the 15th, which is basically just our application to get into the Music Education program. I'm hoping to make it in... it doesn't seem like I should have too much trouble, but you never know. But, even if I don't it's not like I don't have enough classes to take to fill the void. It'd just throw off my schedule a bit.

Anyhow, about today. I didn't have Music Theory! I just went to Music Civ, and then finished my Theory homework, turned it in at my Professor's door and took a nice 20 minute nap on a bench. I met Ashley and we went to Book of Mormon. It was a fun class, too. Today our personal application papers were due, so it was nice to know that it's done with. Not that it was very hard, at all, but it's nice to be done with it all the same. After that Ashley went to class and I had lunch. Mmmm... they had such delicious choices for lunch. Chicken Fajitas Wraps and Navajo Tacos. Those are two of my favorite lunches ever.

Orchestra was pretty much the same as always, and CS 235 was thrilling as ever. Actually, it was interesting. I normally find that class interesting... I guess that's why it's one of my majors. :p Anyhow, we talked about "Big Oh." It's basically estimating how fast an algorithm runs. It reminded me a lot of limits. It was like being back in a math class. Aww... math, how I miss thee. No worries, I won't miss it much next semester and the semester after that when I'm taking Calculus 1 and 2. It'll be hard, that's for sure, but I'll be glad that I took them in the long run. I like knowing Calculus. It's actually a lot of fun once I get it. If I don't understand the concept... then it's just confusion to the max.

I'm really looking forward to tomorrow. There's a new Smallville, there'll most likely be Hawaiian Haystacks for dinner, and I don't have a TA meeting at 6:30! We usually have TA meetings from 6:30 to 7:30 on Thursdays... which very inconveniently conflicts with Smallville. Though, I've just been finding streaming links and watching them online. Though, it's just that much more fun to watch it on a TV right when it first airs. It's just cool to know that you're watching it for the first time with so many other people. So, yeah. Tomorrow = good times.

In other news, I've been getting creepy phone calls. The caller ID just says "Unknown Number" and they just call and leave a silent message. They called on Monday at about 11:00 (I believe), and then twice on Tuesday at 11:00 and 3:33, and then three times today at 11:00, 3:41, and 5:48. All at times that I'm not at the dorm. A couple times I can hear something in the background, like faint voices, but it's so quiet I can't make it out. So, I'm suspecting they'll call again tomorrow at 11:00, and I'll be there this time. I'm going to answer it this time and figure out who it freakin' is. I was asking some other oboists at master classes tonight about it, and one figured that it was just telemarketers. Which, that makes a lot of sense... but why not leave a message? That'd be very disappointing if that was it. Though, I'm not sure what to expect otherwise. What if it was something "exciting?" What if it was some creepy stalker guy? Yeah, right. It's probably something dumb. I guess I'll just have to find out! :)